Try reading it backwards.
Among the dire results of my “unnaturalness” I had been told that I should go blind and go mad. I believed this. In a kind of cold reasonableness, I tried to teach myself to type and play the piano with my eyes shut, against the time I should be blind.
Valentine Ackland, in the aftermath of her parents’ discovery in 1922 that she and a school friend, Lana, had been lovers. She was forbidden any further communication with Lana. For Sylvia: An Honest Account, 1985. (from Lesbian Quotations, Rosemary Silva)
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